


Hold Me While I Struggle

by PrinceAzrael



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Character Death, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Sorry, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-02
Updated: 2019-07-20
Packaged: 2019-10-02 16:24:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17267429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrinceAzrael/pseuds/PrinceAzrael
Summary: Jefferson and Hamilton have always been rivals, so what is Thomas doing by taking Alexander into his home after he comes to work looking like more of a disaster than usual?





	1. The Fight Starts With Me

The office was never quieter than when Alexander Hamilton wasn’t there. The first day he was missing, everyone assumed Washington had finally forced him to use his accumulated vacation time or to stay home and heal any illness he might have caught. But, as the days went on, coworkers began to wonder more and more about what could keep him away for so long, especially considering the last time he was out of the office he could only be kept out for a single day to heal a fever.

 

Thomas Jefferson was parking his car in the employee parking lot when he noticed a bus across the street stop and let one of it’s passengers off. On closer inspection, he realised it was Alexander Hamilton himself, who began walking towards Thomas to reach the entrance of the law firm behind him. The closer Alexander got, the more Thomas realised he looked terrible. He took note of the puffy, pink eyes, sad expression, and rumpled clothing the other man  wore.

 

Thomas decided to brush it all off and began his short walk to his office. It certainly wasn’t the first time the other man had come to work in a similar state, whether from sleep deprivation or another illness he was trying to ignore. 

 

It was only a couple hours later when Thomas heard his office door open and then quickly slam shut, followed by the sound of harsh breathing. He looked up from his work to find Alexander panting and pushing his back up against Thomas’ closed door, looking even worse than when Thomas saw him in the parking lot outside.

 

“What on Earth are you doing?” Thomas asked, finding no reason why his biggest rival could possibly be in his office. 

 

Alexander jumped slightly when Thomas spoke, slightly startled and finally looking over at the office’s original occupant. He seemed sheepish as he gave his reply. “Washington is trying to send me home.”

 

“So you came here?” Thomas didn’t understand why Alexander thought he would him safe. If anything, having the other man go home would only make his job easier, since he wouldn’t have to put up with Alexander’s arguments and protests. “If you’re sick, why don’t you get a little more rest back at home?”

 

“I’m not sick, and I figured this would be the last place anyone would look.” He had a point there. The legendary feud between Alexander and Thomas meant no one would ever think to ask Thomas where the other man had gone. 

 

“Whatever. Go find a different hidding spot. I have work to do and don’t want you here.”

 

A pinging sound came from the computer in front of Thomas, causing him to look at a notification in the corner of the monitor. Alexander was too far to read any of the words on screen, but he watched as Thomas clicked on the notification, which opened up his email.

 

“Washington just sent out an office-wide email to notify him if we know where you are,” Thomas relayed. “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t tell him where you are.” He placed both of his elbows on the desk and interlaced his fingers before resting his chin on them.

 

“Please,” Alexander choked out. He looked like he was suddenly on the verge of tears. “The kids are with Eliza’s father right now and I don’t want to go home when it’s so quiet. I’ve already been there for the last week.”

 

“I didn’t know Mrs. Hamilton was leaving to visit her father. Why didn’t you go with them? Work isn’t that imp-” Thomas cut himself off when Alexander let out a sob. 

 

“Eliza isn’t- She didn’t go with them. Last week she… was in an accident.” Tears were now streaming down Alexander’s face.

 

“So… why aren’t you visiting her?” Thomas cautiously asked.

 

“I… already did.”

 

Thomas sighed before gesturing vaguely toward the couch on the other side of his office. “Whatever. Sit over there and stay quiet.” He turned back to his work as Alexander shuffled over to the couch.

 

The next time Thomas looked up from his work, he found Alexander asleep on the couch. Thomas figured he was getting even less sleep than usual. He could sympathise with how Alexander was feeling. After his wife, Martha, became ill after giving birth to their youngest child, he had been unable to sleep for several days, only growing worse after she died. He still had nights where he found himself awake late at night, missing her presence around the house.    
  


Thomas sighed once more and opened his email back up to let Washington know Alexander was sleeping on his couch and the search party could be called off. He paused for a minute before tacking on a question, asking what happened to Eliza.

 

Washington replied quickly with just a link to a video of a news report from last week. The title of the video was a simple “Peaceful Protest Turns Violent.”

 

Thomas clicked the play button on the video and watched as a woman on screen stood in front of the New York Capitol Building.

 

“I’m on the scene of what once was a protest for women's’ rights. Just moments ago, the previously peaceful protest turned sour when a policeman fired into the crowd, killing one Mrs. Elizabeth Hamilton, also known as Eliza by close friends and family. Reports say Miss Hamilton was attempting to stand in front of a young girl who was standing  in the crowd and save her when saw the officer in question pull out his gun. 

 

“The young girl was standing near the front of the crowd and arguing with the officer who started the shooting, when she took a step forward after being accidentally pushed forward and the officer took the advance as a threat. Miss Hamilton witnessed the event and pushed the girl out of the way, but was shot in the process. Here’s the officer’s response to the event.”

 

The video changed to a shot of a man standing at a podium, giving an interview.

 

“I don’t regret shooting her,” he started off. “The girl was clearly about to attack me and I was only defending myself.

 

The video changed back over to the woman giving the report on the shooting. 

 

“Already we are seeing backlash from the community, demanding punishment for the officer. As of right now, he has seen no reprimand for his actions other than a week of forced vacation. 

 

“Miss Hamilton died shortly after reaching the hospital for emergency procedures. We have attempted to reach Miss Hamilton’s husband for comment, but he refused to give us any further information. She will be missed by her friends and family. 

 

“Now, back to the studio for the weather.”

 

“That man went back to work today.” Thomas jumped slightly when he heard a voice behind him and swiveled his chair around quickly, finding Alexander standing there with a blank expression on his face. “I figured if he was going to work after Eliza’s death, I should too. It was a really idiotic idea, now that I think about it.” 

 

“I thought you’d be asleep a little longer,” Thomas said as he turned back to his computer and closed the video.

 

“No. Nightmares.”

 

Thomas had never seen Alexander so quiet and uncertain. “You should head home then. There’s no way you can get any work done today.”

 

“I know, but…” Alexander looked away from Thomas. “I don’t want to go back to our house right now.”

 

Thomas understood not wanting to be in a place with so many painful memories. He’d stayed away from Monticello for months before finally going back to sort through Martha’s belongings after she died. James had tried to convince him to sort through them sooner, but he’d been too stubborn to listen.

 

“Come stay with me,” Thomas heard himself saying before he really registered the fact that he was speaking. 

 

Alexander looked equally confused as Thomas did. “Okay,” he hesitantly replied. Too late to take it back now.

 

Thomas gave a small, nervous smile and packed up his briefcase with any work he could finish at home. He sent one last email to Washington, telling him he was heading home with Alexander and wouldn’t be in the office for the next few days. After he was finished, he turned back to the other man with a kinder smile and lead him out to his car.

 

They both got comfortable in the seats of the car and Thomas began talking. “My daughters, Patsy and Mary, are going to be home from school in a couple hours. I think you’ll love them. Patsy, my eldest, wants to be president one day, and Mary gets sick easily, but refuses to be seen as weak.”

 

Alexander gave Thomas a small smile. “You’re right. I like them already. Maybe they could meet my own kids some day.”

 

“I’m sure they’d love that. Speaking of, when do they come back from Senator Schuyler’s home?”

 

“The plan is on Friday, but Mr. Schuyler is worried I can’t take care of myself right now, let alone children.” Alexander looked absolutely outraged by the mere idea that someone thought he couldn’t take care of his own kids.

 

Thomas kept the idea that Mr. Schuyler may have been right as they continued their conversation. Alexander didn’t need to hear that right now. He pulled into the driveway of his New York home and stepped out of the car.

 

Alexander and Thomas walked up to the front door of the large home. While Thomas pulled out his keys to unlock the door, Alexander looked around, slightly in awe of the building’s extravagance.

 

“This place is pretty big for a small family,” Alexander spoke up.

 

Thomas paused with his key in the lock and looked around. “I guess it is. Martha and I always talked about having a large family with lots of children running around, so we bought a house for all those children.” He resumed unlocking the door and opened it up, gesturing for Alexander to enter first.

 

Alexander walked in and immediately noticed a large photograph of the Jefferson family at the top of a set of stairs where anyone who entered the front door would have to see it. Thomas stood slightly to the side with a toddler in his arms and a bright smile on his face, unbothered by the little girl’s hand buried in his curls.Martha sat in a chair at the center of the photo with a soft smile and a newborn on her lap. They all looked so happy. Alexander pulled his eyes away and found several more photos lining the walls of the family and then of Thomas and his daughters as they grew up. 

 

“Are you hungry?” Thomas spoke up behind Alexander. He closed the door behind himself and hung his jacket on a coat rack that stood by the door. 

 

Alexander watched Thomas get comfortable in his own home before answering, “Maybe.”

 

“Maybe?” Thomas repeated. “How can you not know?”

 

“I haven’t had a very large appetite since Eliza…” Alexander looked away, unable to continue.

 

Thomas gave Alexander a disapproving frown. “When’s the last time you ate?”

 

Alexander stopped to think. “Three… Maybe four…” He was mumbling to himself and attempting to count time on his fingers.

 

“Four… hours?” Thomas asked hopefully.

 

Alexander had the audacity to look guilty as he shook his head and looked away. “Days.”

 

Thomas was absolutely horrified at Alexander’s self neglect. “Dear god.” He grabbed the other’s sleeve and began to drag him towards the kitchen. “I’m making mac and cheese and you’re going to shut up and enjoy it. He reached the pantry and let go of Alexander to grab a package of elbow macaroni and shoved it in his arms. “Hold this.” Thomas rummaged a little further in the pantry and pulled out a few more ingredients. He grabbed Alexander’s sleeve again and dragged him into the kitchen. THomas placed the ingredients on the counter and turned toward Alexander to lift him onto the counter right next to the ingredients and across from the stove.

 

Alexander struggled when Thomas lifted him by his waist to place him where Thomas could see him while cooking. “What the hell?” He made to hop off the counter, but Thomas glared angrily, so he stayed put.

 

“Stay,” Thomas commanded, before turning around and pulling a pot out of the cupboard next to the stove. He filled the pot with water in the sink and set it to boil. Turning back to Alexander, he held his hand out and demanded, “Pasta.”

 

Alexander looked at the elbow macaroni he still held in his hands before handing it over. 

 

“You're really thin,” Thomas said to start a conversation. An awkward one, but a conversation nonetheless. “Too thin to have just started skipping meals a few days ago.”

 

“I skipped lunch and dinner a lot when I was too absorbed in my work,” Alexander said unapologetically. “Always had a large amount of coffee though, so I never get too hungry.”

 

“How have you not had a heart attack or some sort of caffeine overdose by now?”

 

“Sheer force of will.”

 

“Of course you're too stubborn to die.” Thomas pulled the boiling pot of macaroni and water off the stove and drained it in the sink. He placed it back on the stove and opened up the fridge to pull out a block of cheese and some milk. “I'm not giving you any coffee while you're here.”

 

Alexander let out a pitiful whining sound. 

 

“You know the more you drink, the higher your tolerance becomes. It must take you at least three times as much coffee as it should to have any effect, if not more.”

 

“That explains so much,” Alexander mumbled. 

 

Thomas grated the cheese into the macaroni as he continued to talk. “So you missed lunch and dinner, but not breakfast?”

 

“Of course.” Alexander had a shit eating grin on his face as he continued to talk, knowing Thomas would find his answer infuriating. “It’s the most important meal of the day.”

 

“That is such a smart-ass reply. I don't know why I didn't expect you to throw it in my face. Anyways, what do you want to drink?”

 

“What do you have?”

 

“A couple different types of sweet tea, milk, some Sprite, water…” Thomas stopped to think about what else might be in his fridge. “I think the girls keep a few different types of juice around.”

 

“Orange juice?”

 

Thomas gave the pasta a quick stir before opening up the fridge. “Is orange-cranberry okay? Mary is always putting it in the cart when we go grocery shopping, so I don't buy plain orange juice very often.” 

 

“That’s fine.”

 

Thomas pulled a mug out of a cupboard nearby and filled it with juice before handing it to Alexander. He added a few more ingredients to the pot on the stove, gave it one last thorough stir, pulled two bowls out, and then scooped the macaroni into them evenly. “Here,” he said as he passed one of the bowls to Alexander. “Do you want a spoon or a fork?”

 

“Fork,” Alexander replied. “I like stabbing my macaroni. 

 

Thomas pulled open a drawer and grabbed two forks. “Patsy is the same way. Mary prefers using a spoon because ‘it’s less savage,” he said, making air quotes with his fingers. “She takes after her mother more than me.” He gave Alexander one of the forms and settled into a stool next to where Alexander still sat on the counter. 

 

“Can I get down now?” Alexander asked. 

 

Thomas pretended to think for a minute before replying with a teasing smile. “No.”

 

“Asshole.” Alexander hopped down and climbed into a stool next to Thomas. 

 

They both settled into a strangely comfortable salience as they ate. Before they knew it, both bowls were empty and placed in the sink to be washed later. 

 

“Want to watch a movie?” Thomas asked as they walked out of the kitchen. 

 

“Sure,” Alexander replied. 

 

They both wandered into Thomas’ living room. Alexander settled into what was possibly the most comfortable couch he has ever seen and tucked his feet underneath himself, while Thomas knelt in front of a large shelf of movies. 

 

“Anything specific you want to watch?” Thomas asked. “I have Harry Potter, a sizable Disney collection, Lord of the Rings. I think the girls have taken over my movie collection.”

 

Alexander gave Thomas a small smile. “I've been forced to watch every Disney movie made in the last few years by my own kids.” His smile morphed into a smirk as he continued with, “Don't lie though. You're a huge nerd that loves all those movies. Don't think I didn't see you reading  _ The Hobbit _ last week.”

 

Thomas sputtered his response. “Psh- What? Me? Of course not.” He looked away from Alexander’s smug face. “Just pick a movie.”

 

“I love  _ The Little Mermaid _ , if you have it.”

 

“ _ The Little Mermaid _ it is.” Thomas quickly scanned the films before plucking one from the shelves. He grabbed a remote from the coffee table in front of the couch and turned on the TV. After putting the movie in, he moved to sit next to Alexander on the couch. 

 

The two lapsed back into the comfortable silence from earlier as they watched, Alexander quietly singing along to the songs. Just after Ariel asked Ursula to give her legs, they heard the front door open and shut, followed by two voices calling out. 

 

“Dad?” a young voice called. 

 

“We're home!” a slightly older voice called out right after. 

 

“In the living room,” Thomas called out. 

 

Two pairs of feet could be heard running down the halls until two young girls turned the corner into the room where the two men were sitting. 

 

“Hey girls,” Thomas greeted them. “How was school today?”

 

The older girl perked up. “The principal announced that student body elections would start on Monday and anyone junior year or older can run for student body president. Can we go shopping for poster supplies this weekend?”

 

“Sure thing, Patsy.” Thomas gave her a proud smile before turning toward his younger daughter. “How about you, Mary?”

 

“The seventh grade classes are taking a trip to the White House next month. I have a form you need to sign if I can go.”

 

“Finish up your homework and then I'll sign it. Maybe we can stay in our Monticello home while you're there.” Thomas noticed his daughters’ eyes wandering toward where Alexander sat next to him. “Girls, this is my coworker, Alexander Hamilton. He'll be staying with us for a while.” Alexander gave a little wave as he was being introduced, an awkward smile on his face. 

 

“Is this the same Hamilton that created that financial plan at work you're always complaining about?” Pasty asked. 

 

“And that you said has Mr. Washington in his pocket last week?” Mary spoke up. 

 

“Didn't you say he dressed like the pits of fashion last night?” Patsy continued. 

 

Thomas rushed to get up and hush them both. “You must be mistaken.”

 

Patsy frowned. “No, I remember you calling him a prick and that someone needed to stop him from ruining the whole company before it was too late.”

 

“Alright,” Thomas interrupted before they could throw him under the bus even further. “You both have homework to do. Go on.”

 

The two girls both waved at Alexander before walking out to work on whatever homework they had. Once they'd finished up, they wandered back into the living room to watch a short marathon of Disney movies with the two adults and for Mary to have Thomas sign her permission slip. 

 

That night, both men stood in Thomas' bedroom as Thomas rummaged through his drawers. He pulled out a folded pair of some of the softest pajamas Alexander had ever felt in his life. 

 

“Tomorrow, we can go to your place after the girls have left for school and pick up some of your own clothes,” Thomas said with a soothing tone and a soft smile. “But for now, you'll have to borrow some of mine.”

 

The pants were far too long for Alexander's legs, the draw-string having to be pulled much tighter to avoid losing them, the sleeves of the shirt fell over his hands and dropped toward the ground whenever he lifted his hands, and the shoulder kept slipping down farther and farther until he finally pulled it back up. 

 

“That will be nice,” Alexander responded. He was lead out into the hall and toward one of the guest rooms, which was painted a subtle shade of mint green. 

 

“The girls and I call this the green bedroom. I figured it would be perfect for you while you stay with us, since you're always wearing that hideous green suit in the office.” Thomas ignored the glare Alexander gave him. “My room is just across the hall. If you need anything tonight, feel free to ask.”

 

Alexander gave a slight nod and was left to his own devices. 

 

Thomas crossed the hall into his own room, which was painted a deep shade of magenta along the fat wall and a light beige color along the other three. He readied himself for bed and was asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow, feeling like he'd had a long day. 

 

At some point later that night, Thomas was jostled awake when he felt the bed next to him dip and a face bury itself into his back. He groaned and turned his head to figure out who his new bedmate was. 

 

“What the fuck, Hamilton?”

 

Alexander buried himself deeper into Thomas' back and tightly gripped his shirt. “Shut up. I told you back at the office that I've been having nightmares ever since…” A heavy silence fell over the two men for only a few seconds before Alexander felt the need to break it. “You smell nice. Like fresh ink and the earth after it rains.”

 

“Hamilton, that's creepy as fuck.”

 

“Eliza smelled like freshly picked flowers and then, after Philip was born, smelled just like motherhood.”

 

Thomas could feel tears soaking through the back of his shirt where Alexander's face was buried. “I didn't know motherhood had a smell.”

 

“Neither did I, before Philip, but somehow she did. After he died she still had that scent of motherhood, but I think his death changed her, because she suddenly had the smell of fresh tears behind everything else.”

 

“Tears have a smell too?” Thomas turned around to look at Alexander as he spoke. 

 

Alexander just buried his face into Thomas' chest instead, soaking a new spot on his shirt in tears. His hand reached up to grab onto the shirt he was crying into. “Yeah. Like salt and a lingering sadness.”

 

“I never knew so many strange things had their own smell.”

 

Alexander perked up at Thomas with a small, teary smile. “Nowhere near as strange as Jacky smelled.”

 

“Jacky?”

 

The small smile disappeared, replaced by a sad, far away look. “John Laurens. The only people who called him Jacky where the people closest to him.”

 

“What happened to him?”

 

“He joined the army straight out of high school. We wrote letters to each other every day while he was still in basic training and later we called and video chatted as often as we could. We were planning to get married once he finished serving, but a week before his scheduled flight back there was an incident with another soldier. They'd gotten into an argument and Jacky was shot because the other man got too worked up. A few days later, I received a letter from the base he was stationed in. I assumed it was just another one of our usual letters, since we continued to send them after he left basic. I was wrong.”

 

The heavy silence fell over them once more as Alexander began to cry even harder, but this time Thomas broke it in an attempt to cheer Alexander back up. “You said he had a strange smell?”

 

“Yeah,” Alexander’s muffled voice said from within the front of Thomas’ shirt. “Like stupidity and gunpowder.”

 

“That's the strangest smell I've ever heard of.”

 

“I agree, but it fit. He was always there for for a fight back in school. I can't name a single fight he got into where he didn't come out injured in some way. But even he had a bloody nose or a black eye, he was always ready to start another fight the best day. I guess that's what got him killed in the end.”

 

“Tell me more.”

 

Eventually they both fell asleep, still cuddled close together as Alexander told Thomas stories about John when they were still young. 

 

The next morning, Thomas woke up alone, cuddling a pillow instead of Alexander, like he had when he fell asleep last night. He looked over to the clock on the bedside table next to him and realised he hadn't set an alarm the night before so he could see his daughters off to the bus. He'll make sure to see them leave tomorrow morning. He rubbed his eyes and rolled out of bed to begin looking for where Alexander could have wandered off. 

 

He found the other man sitting at the dining room table, typing rapidly on his phone and drinking heavily from the largest coffee mug Thomas owned. 

 

“What are you doing, Hamilton?” Thomas asked. 

 

“Working.” Alexander took a large gulp of coffee without looking away from his phone. “Left my laptop at work.”

 

“I see… And what are you drinking?”

 

“Coffee.”

 

“And how many cups have you had this morning?”

 

Alexander shrugged, still not looking away from whatever he was typing on his phone. “I lost count after four or five.”

 

Thomas walked over and grabbed the cup out of Alexander's hand. “I'm cutting you off. I remember saying no coffee in my house last night, anyways.”

 

“No, you said you wouldn't give me any coffee, so I got my own.”Alexander stood up and made grabby hands toward the coffee Thomas was holding above his head. 

 

“You make me spill this, I'll pour what's left over your head,” Thomas said as he walked into the kitchen. He dumped the half empty cup down the sink and then grabbed what was left of the pot to pour that out as well. “Where did you even find coffee? I thought I didn't have any.” He set the empty mug down in front of where Alexander was standing at the counter. 

 

Alexander grabbed the mug and looked inside, hoping to find at least some of the bitter liquid still inside. “Fuck you,” he said when he found it was empty. 

 

“Hamilton, seriously. Where's the coffee?”

 

“Above the fridge,” Alexander replied with a glare. 

 

Thomas walked over to the fridge and reached up, feeling around before pulling down a small package of very old coffee beans. “Did you smell these out like a hunting dog? I didn't even know I had them.”

 

Alexander just pouted and glared at the countertop. 

 

Knowing he wasn't getting a response, Thomas changed the conversation topic. “Ready to pick up some clothes from your house?”

 

“You're pushy and I hate you.” Alexander moved his glare to Thomas' face. 

 

Thomas just raised an eyebrow. “I guess you want to keep wearing clothing several sizes too big.”

 

“Fine, let's go.” Alexander pushed his phone into the pocket of what Thomas was now realising were his jeans, held up by a belt and with the cuffs rolled up, to avoid dragging the legs on the floor. He was also wearing one of Thomas’ purple tee shirts, and the neck was sliding down his shoulder, similarly to the pajamas he wore the previous night. 

 

“Did you steal my clothes?” Thomas asked. 

 

“Yes.” Alexander walked over to the front door to pull on his shoes. 

 

Not knowing what else to say about that, Thomas followed Alexander toward the front door and pulled on a black jacket, which had been hanging on the coat rack, and grabbed another for Alexander to wear. “Here, borrow this until we get one from your place.”

 

Alexander looked at the piece of clothing held out to him like it was personally offensive. “What kind of color is that?”

 

Thomas pulled the jacket close with a wounded pout on his face. “It's magenta. Martha always said I looked really nice in this color.”

 

Alexander lifted a skeptical eyebrow. “Really?”

 

“Yes, really. You sound just like Mary when she complains about my clothing. Just take the damn jacket.”

 

“At least one of the Jeffersons is sensible,” Alexander mumbled under his breath as he took the jacket and pulled it on. 

 

Thomas looked at Alexander for a few seconds before deciding, “That's not your color.”

 

“No shit!”

 

The two men swapped jackets before stepping out into the cool air. 

 

What should have been a short drive felt even longer with the awkward, depressed air Alexander was creating with his bad mood. After what felt to Thomas like hours, but had really only been a few short minutes, he pulled into the driveway of a small house with all the lights turned off. 

 

The two climbed out of the car and walked up to the front door while Alexander fiddled with his keys, looking for the right one to unlock the door. 

 

Thomas peered into the dark windows near him while waiting, hoping to see what the other man's house was like before even walking through the door. However, it was so dark inside that he couldn’t see much more than the back of a couch and a lamp sitting right next to the window he was looking through. 

 

Just then, Alexander turned his key in the lock and finally opened up the door. He hesitated for a moment before stepping inside, hanging his borrowed coat on a peg by the entrance and toeing off his shoes to walk farther into the house. 

 

Thomas followed Alexander's example and trailed after him into the man's bedroom, where he was pulling a suitcase out of a closet. 

 

“Can I help you get anything?” Thomas asked, finally breaking the awkward silence that had hung over them since leaving Thomas' home. 

 

Alexander whirled around, both having not expected Thomas to follow him into the bedroom or to ask if he could help. His sudden movements jostled the delicates balance inside the closet, causing several folded sheets to fall from the top shelf and land right on top of Alexander. 

 

The two were silent for a moment before Alexander answered, with the sheets still covering his face. “It’s fine. I have some juice in the fridge if you'd like it.”

 

“Er, okay I guess?” Thomas replied, not really knowing how to respond to what he had witnessed. He backed out of the room and wandered into another part of the house. 

 

Once Alexander finally heard Thomas leave, he pulled off the sheets, revealing his face, which was furiously blushing out if embarrassment. 

 

Meanwhile, Thomas was wandering through the rest of the house and looking around for the kitchen to get that glass of juice Alexander had mentioned. He very quickly located the kitchen and started rummaging around the cupboards for a glass. 

 

After he had acquired a glass and poured some juice into it, he began to look around the house a little, not quite snooping, but still being a bit busier than what was probably polite. He wandered into the living room, which he had attempted to look into while still outside, and looked around, quickly spotting a few photographs above the fireplace. He went in for a closer look and realised they were somewhat separated. 

 

On one side of the mantle, a large collection of family photos and pictures of Alexander's children was gathered, all looking into the camera and smiling widely, and on the other there were only three photos of individual people Thomas had never seen before. 

 

He glanced quickly over the family photos to focus on the individual portraits. At first glance it was a worn photo of a beautiful woman and then two photos of the same young man in military attire, but after looking closer Thomas noticed some slight differences between them. The two photos were slightly different quality, af if several years had passed between when they were taken. The slightly grainier photo captured a man with wild, curly hair tied back and a small smile, while the other held a boy with very similar features, but his cheeks were rounder, his eyes had the same color and shape as Alexander's, and his hair was kept loose. The biggest difference between the two was the expressions on their faces. The first was happy and easy-going, while the other had a proud smirk on his face that Thomas had seen on Alexander's face every time he’d beaten Thomas in a debate at work. 

 

“The one with his hair tied back is John,” Thomas heard from behind him. He turned around to find Alexander standing there with a suitcase at his side. 

 

His first thought was that he must have been staring at these photos for longer than he thought. “Who are the other two?” He asked, gesturing towards the three photos. 

 

Alexander stepped forward and placed a gentle hand on the frame of the picture holding the other boy. “This is Philip. Eliza andI always called him Pip, unless he was in trouble. He was my oldest.” He picked up the last photo gently and cradled it in his hands with a tender look before saying, “And this was my mother.”

 

He couldn't help but notice that Alexander used past tense for both of these people. “What happened to them?”

 

“Pip was a lot like John. Not only in looks, but in actions as well. He went to join the military right out of high school and was injured in the line of duty. He was shot right between the ribs and quickly flown back home. Eliza and I saw him in his last moments.”

 

“And your mother?” Thomas gestured to the photo Alexander was still carrying and staring sadly at. 

 

“Died when I was twelve. We both got sick around the same time, but when she could only afford medicine for one of us, she insisted I take it. I was too ill to refuse.” He glanced at the collection of photos with an expression of longing. 

 

Thomas only had to think for a moment before saying, “You could bring them with you.” Alexander looked startled as his head whipped around to stare at Thomas. “I only mean that the room you're staying in is yours to decorate while you're there.” Thomas began to ramble nervously as Alexander continued to stare. “And I can see how much you cared about these people, so you don't have to leave them behind.”

 

“Thank you,” Alexander quietly spoke up. He picked up the three photos, then quickly looked through the others, before pulling down one where he's surrounded by his family, and another where Eliza is peacefully reading by a tree. He holds them close to his chest as he grabs the bag he brought out of his room earlier and the two men head for the door, but not before Thomas took the bag from Alexander's hand once he notices how precarious the pile of items he's carrying is. 

 

The ride back to Thomas’ home was much less awkward. Thomas turned on some quiet jazz and Alexander quickly fell asleep to the soothing music. Thomas looked over at one red light and smiled slightly, knowing the other had been exhausted lately from lack of sleep. 

 

As Thomas parked the car, he was reluctant to wake the other man, so quietly climbed out after shutting off the engine and walked around to Alexander’s door. He slowly pulled open the door and unbuckled the seatbelt so he could carefully lift Alexander into his arms. Thomas wasn't quite sure why he expected the other to be heavier when he knew just how skinny he was, but was still surprised when Alexander seemed almost weightless in his arms. He decided he'd just have to convince him to eat a bit more while staying in his home. 

 

Thomas walked up to his front door and quickly realised he would have trouble opening the front door, since his keys were safely in his pocket. He shifted Alexander in his arms, praying he wouldn't wake up as he pulled out the key to unlock the front door. He let out a sigh of relief when the door was open and Alexander remained deep asleep. 

 

Thomas carried Alexander into his room and pulled off his shoes. Afterwards, he was quickly tucked into his bed and Thomas walked back out to the car as soon as his arms were free to collect Alexander's things. Not wanting to make too much noise and wake Alexander right after he's just gotten him in bed, he left everything outside the room to be put away later. 

 

A few hours later, a bleary eyed Alexander wandered into the living room, still wrapped in the comforter from his room, just to find Thomas sprawled across the couch, watching something on the TV. He slowly shuffled over to the couch and dropped on top of Thomas, forcing him to let out an “oof” sound at the sudden pressure on his stomach. He snuggled closer to the other man's chest to make himself more comfortable and quickly fell back asleep. 

 

Thomas huffed out a quiet laugh before settling back into the couch to watch the cooking show on the TV screen, resigned to his fate of being a body pillow. 


	2. And Ends With Us

That Friday, Thomas woke up to Alexander pacing around the dining room while furiously typing on his phone. 

 

“Alex,” he said, trying to get the other's attention and failing spectacularly when he was just ignored and Alexander began mumbling to himself. “Alex,” he tried again, a little louder. Once again Thomas was ignored. Getting fed up, he decided to switch tactics. “Get off your damn phone, Hamilton!”

 

Alexander looked up just long enough to let out a “Fuck you,” before bending back over his phone, only pausing briefly to grab handfuls of chocolate out of a jar on the table next to him. 

 

Thomas gave a heavy sigh before walking over and looking over Alexander's shoulder at what he could possibly be typing so furiously. Upon closer inspection, he realised Alexander was in the middle of an argument with Philip Schuyler through a series of text messages. The messages flew across the screen so fast that he couldn't quite figure out what the argument was about. He was just about to interrupt once more to figure out what was happening when the phone began to ring. 

 

Alexander answered and immediately threw himself back into the argument. “I'm telling you that we agreed I would get them today! You can't back out now!” The pause Philip to talk was brief before Alexander jumped back in to shout, “They're my kids! I can take care of them fine!”

 

Remembering the conversation the two had days ago on the drive to Thomas’ home for the first time, Thomas realised that today was the day Alexander's children were supposed to come home from Philip's house. 

 

Thomas tubes back into the conversation only to hear Alexander's tone turn slightly sheepish. “Well no, I haven't been staying in my own home, but I'll be going back today if you'd just give me back my kids.” Alexander paused for only a short moment before realisation seemed to dawn on him. “Wait a minute. How did you know I'm not staying at home?” A short pause. “You've been spying on me!?” he exploded. “Are you aware of how completely unethical keeping watch over someone's house is? It's a complete invasion of privacy! If you wanted to know how I was handling everything you could've figured it out any number of ways, least of which was just asking me!”

 

Thomas decided the argument had gone on long enough and grabbed the phone before Alexander could continue shouting about his privacy. “Senator Schuyler?” Thomas spoke as he put the phone to his ear while Alexander was still wondering what happened and flexing his fingers that only a moment ago had a phone in them. 

 

“Who is this?” Thomas heard from the other line. 

 

Alexander had finally caught up with what had happened to his phone and began to grab at it while Thomas maneuvered around him. 

 

“My name is Thomas Jefferson, sir. I'm the friend Alex has been staying with,” Thomas replied. 

 

Realising that just grabbing for his phone wasn't working against Thomas’ tall, muscular frame, he began shouting as well. “You fucking shit, give that back!”

 

Thomas ignored the shouts as Philip replied, “Jefferson? You wouldn't be the same Jefferson that Alexander was complaining about a few weeks ago during our family dinner, would you?”

 

“That's probably me.”

 

“Really? Because I distinctly remember him saying you were some no good southerner with corrupt views and a lack of good, moral judgement.”

 

“That's definitely me then.”

 

“Interesting. To what do I owe the honor of speaking to the man Alexander holds in the highest contempt?”

 

“I couldn't help but overhear the conversation that Alex was screaming at the top of his lungs and figured I could offer a compromise.” 

 

“What kind of compromise?”

 

“I own a rather large house, which, as you know, Alex has been staying in for the last few days. Since you seem so concerned that he won't go home after picking up his kids, why not just let them stay here? I have more than enough room for them all to stay.”

 

Thomas heard Alexander grow quiet at hearing his suggestion as Philip let out a considering hum. 

 

“I was under the impression the two of you were enemies.”

 

“We are, sir. Nothing wrong with a healthy rivalry.”

 

“And yet you offer your home for your enemy and him children?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Interesting,” Philip said once more. There was a long, considering pause in conversation before Thomas finally received a response. “Very well. I'll have some drivers drop them and their belongings off this afternoon.” With that said, he hung up and Thomas was left wondering what had just happened. 

 

A realisation seemed to come to him a moment later. “Doesn't he need my address?” he asked Alexander, who was strangely quiet. 

 

The question seemed to jumpstart Alexander's brain as he answered, “He probably already knows it.”

 

Thomas decided not to let that tidbit of information make him uncomfortable and watched as Alexander slowly walked away, likely back to his room. 

 

As he reached the hall leading to the bedrooms, Alexander turned and let out a quick “Thank you,” before turning back to the hall and fleeing. 

 

Thomas allowed a small smile to show as he turned toward the table, where Alexander had left the jar of chocolate. He didn't remember buying it, so assumed his guest was the one to bring it into the house. He grabbed a couple of the round lumps and popped them into his mouth, expecting to simply bite through the soft chocolate, but pausing when he but through something crunchy in the center. It only took him a moment to realise what the center of the candy was. 

 

“Hamilton!” Thomas yelled angrily. “Did you bring chocolate covered coffee beans into my house?”

 

From down the hall he heard a distant “Fuck,” and the thumps of feet running away. 

 

“Get back here you little shit!” Thomas began running down the hall after Alexander, following the sound of screeching. 

 

Later that day, after Thomas had thrown out Alexander's smuggled coffee to a chorus of whining, Patsy and Mary come home to the news that they'll soon have even more guests. Thomas lets out a sigh of relief when they not only take it well, but grow excited at the prospect of more children their age staying at the house. 

 

“What are their names?” Mary asked Alexander. 

 

Happy to talk about his children, he responded, “My youngest is Philip. He's only two years old and loves being carried everywhere. Then Eliza, who is five. She's one of the most polite children I've ever seen and sometimes she even reminds me to use my manners. William is seven and loves to play outside in the mud. John Church is twelve, your age Mary, and spends a lot of time in the library. James is sixteen and is a part of his school's debate club. Alexander, who I call AJ, is eighteen and a lot like me. Loves to talk for hours on end. Lastly, my eldest Angelica, is twenty. She's out of state at a university right now, but might be coming to visit soon.”

 

The two girls seemed even more excited at the descriptions Alexander gave and rans off to their rooms while whispering back and forth. Thomas spoke up. “Unfortunately, my wife couldn't give them any,” he said with a faraway look in his eyes. “They'll love having kids around while you stay.”

 

Alexander was ecstatic that the girls would happily welcome his children into their home. 

 

Just then, the doorbell rang and Alexander rushed to the door, practically bouncing in excitement the whole way. He pulled the door open and let out an excited squeal, before launching himself outside and onto the figures standing on the porch. 

 

Thomas rounded the corner in time to see AJ hand Alexander little Philip, who was quickly showered with affectionate kisses. He watched as all of Alexander's children were peppered with loving smooches on their cheeks, some with more amusement than others, before butting in to save Alexander's latest victim, James, who didn't seem amused by his father's actions. 

 

“Why don't you all come in? Alexander and I can grab your things while you get settled.” He looked behind them to notice several cars and their drivers struggling with the mountains of luggage in the trunks. 

 

James gave Thomas a grateful look and was quick to take Philip from Alexander before running off into the house. The other children quickly followed. 

 

The two men walked down the driveway to help carry the bags that have slowly been piled on the ground. 

 

“I still have Mary's old crib in the attic. I'll pull it down for Philip,” Thomas speaks up. “Do you want it in your room or another guest room? I can find some of her old baby monitors too.” 

 

Alexander smiles. “My room, but I'd still like those baby monitors.”

They both spent the day moving luggage and furniture around the house, once taking a break to smile happily at the sight of Mary and Patsy playing with Pip on the floor. 

 

That night, Thomas heard Alexander sneak into his room once more and set something on the bedside table before crawling into his bed. It was silent for several minutes, but Thomas knew there was no way Alexander had fallen asleep already. 

 

“Nightmares again?” he asked. 

 

Alexander wiggled closer and pressed his face into Thomas’ back, shaking his head furiously. “Not this time.” 

 

Several more minutes pass before Alexander speaks up again. “I loved Eliza so much. I still do. It took me years to finally accept that I could love her too after Jacky died.” Here he gave a small pause. “Is it wrong to fall in love again so soon?”

 

Thomas was shocked, not knowing who Alexander could be in love with already. “I don't know,” he spoke up. “I'm not the best person to ask either. I haven't had a successful relationship since my own wife passed.”

 

Alexander seemed to take a moment to think. “If I did love one more person, how do I know I won't lose them too? I love every day in fear that one day I'll lose the rest of my children and everyone I've ever cared about in some freak accident. Everyone else I've ever loved has been killed, after all.”

 

Thomas wished he could give Alexander all the answers he desired. “I don't know,” he said again. “That's just the risk you take when you choose to love someone.”

 

Alexander wrapped his arms around Thomas' waist. “Would you ever take that risk again?”

 

Thomas had to think for a while before answering. “Maybe. If the right person came along. It was worth it for me the first time around.” He turned around to look at Alexander as he clung to his midsection. “What brought on all of these questions?” 

 

Alexander looked up and bit his lip. “I think I am willing to take that risk one more time.”

 

Thomas was just about to ask who he was in love with when a baby's cries ranf through the room. He looked over at the bedside table, where the cries were coming from, to find the baby monitor he had pulled out of the attic earlier than day. 

 

Alexander sighed before crawling out of bed and grabbing the monitor on the way out. 

 

Thomas felt like screaming. Timing like that only happens in fiction, after all. He rolled back over to go back to sleep, hoping Alexander would come back later that night. 

 

He never did. 

 

The two men spent the entire weekend dancing precariously around each other. It left Thomas confused. They had been fine after their previous strange, late night rendezvous. What was so different this time?”

 

On Sunday night, Thomas sat on the couch on the couch next to Alexander to watch the news. 

 

“I'm going back to work tomorrow,” Thomas spoke up. “You're free to stay here while I'm gone.”

 

“No,” Alexander replied. “I'll go back with you.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“Yeah. I've been cooped up in one place for too long. If I have to skip work another day I think I'll go crazy.”

 

“Okay.”

 

The two descended into a comfortable silence. The prospect of a normal schedule settling whatever uncomfortable mood the two had been in for the last few days. 

 

Thomas awoke the next day to a blaring alarm clock and quickly reached out to turn it off. He rubbed a hand over his face before getting up and preparing for the day. 

 

As he walked into the kitchen after getting dressed, he noticed Patsy sitting at the table, scrolling through something in her phone. 

 

“Up early again?” Thomas asked, knowing she was usually the first person awake every morning. 

 

Patsy gave a small nod in Thomas’ direction. 

 

“Do you think the others would like eggs or pancakes before school?”

 

Patsy looked up with a considering look on her face. “Pancakes,” she answered. 

 

Thomas gave an approving hum, already knowing she'd pick her favorite breakfast food, and moved to the kitchen where he began to cook. “Can you go wake up your sister?” he called behind himself. 

 

Patsy quickly stood up and ran up the stairs, excited for breakfast. 

 

When Patsy came back down the stairs, Thomas called out, “Patsy, can you watch the pancakes while I wake up Alexander?”

 

The young girl walked in and happily took the spatula from her father. 

 

“Dont eat them while I'm gone,” Thomas called back as he climbed the stairs. 

 

He reached Alexander's door and knocked lightly. Hearing a quiet groan on the other side, he turned the knob and walked in. “Good morning, Alexander,” Thomas called out cheerfully. 

 

Alexander groaned loudly before shoving a pillow over his head. He mumbled a couple words into it, which sounded vaguely like “Fuck you, Thomas,” before sitting up and glaring at the man across the room. “Is sleep not sacred to you?”

 

Thomas was hit with the realisation that Alexander hadn't been getting enough sleep lately and felt bad for waking him, but had to so they could both get to work on time. “Nope,” he replied, popping the p to add a little more dramatic flare. “But even if sleep isn't sacred, the pancakes cooking downstairs might be.”

 

That got him out of bed in a hurry. 

 

Thomas walked down the stairs to the sound of Alexander yelling across the house for everyone to get up and be ready for school. He took the spatula back from Patsy and resumed cooking while she walked back to the table where Mary now sat. 

 

It didn't take long for Alexander to walk down the stairs, carrying Philip in his arms. He grabbed some of the pancakes and moved to the table to start eating, handing Philip a plain pancake to eat on his own in Alexander's lap. 

 

The others quickly came downstairs and sat around the table to eat breakfast. 

 

Thomas was suddenly hit by the realisation that the scene before him was strangely domestic, and began to wish it would never end. The large house he'd bought with Martha so many years ago was finally full of children. Thomas was only sad because his late wife couldn't see it so full of life. 

 

Once breakfast was finished, dishes were piled into the sink and the kids were ushered to their buses. The two men were lucky their homes fell into the same school district, because Thomas’ little car wouldn't have been able to drive all of Alexander's kids to school. Once they were off, the two were left with little Pip, who was buckled into a carseat and taken to daycare for the day. 

 

The work day went as smoothly as expected for Alexander's first day back after a long vacation. That is to say, he locked himself away in his office with a constant stream of paperwork and emails moving in and out of the room while interns and secretaries scrambled around to keep up with the hectic pace. Thomas heard one of the interns sighing forlornly and whisper “Vacation is over,” while passing by the other man's office. 

 

Thomas, however, was plagued the entire day by a single thought. Who was Alexander talking about the other night? He'd managed to avoid really thinking about it until getting to his office that morning, but now could only wonder who had stolen Alexander's affections. 

 

Maria Lewis, one of the secretaries who was sucked into the whirlwind that was the production happening in Alexander's office, walked by Thomas’ office in a hurry. She was likely going to grab more paperwork. He felt sorry for her and the others sucked into that disaster. 

 

Suddenly, Thomas remembered when Maria had still been Maria Reynolds. She'd been married to an awful pig of a husband, who abused her regularly and often slept around with different women. Alexander had been the lawyer to help her win the divorce case and have her now ex-husband thrown in jail. She was so grateful that she joined the law firm as a secretary to be closer to Alexander. 

 

There was a short time where the entire office was flowing with rumors of an affair between the two. The rumors have long since been put to rest, but now Thomas was led to wonder if the two really would get together. Could Maria be the mystery person Alexander mentioned that night?

 

Thoughts of who Alexander's mystery suitor was circled Thomas’ head all day. At one point, he'd even considered Angelica Schuyler, Eliza's older sister, before realising she was married to a man named John Church and had punched another man's tooth out the last time someone had suggested she was anything other than completely loyal. Thomas would rather keep his face exactly as it was than even hint that she would cheat on her husband. 

 

Before he knew it, the day had ended and Alexander was knocking on the open door to his office. 

 

“Hey,” Alexander started. “Washington is kicking us out for the night. Something about not overworking myself right after getting back.” He leaned against the door frame with what could only be described as a pout on his face. “It's probably because he feels sorry for my interns though.”

 

“I'll just save what I'm working on then and we can go pick up Pip,” Thomas responded with an amused smile while clicking around on his laptop and organising the papers strewn about in front of himself. 

 

As the two left, Thomas noticed the group of people that was scrambling around Alexander's office only moments ago. Now that the work day was over, they could be found sitting across the couch in Alexander's office in one giant, exhausted pile. Maria was sitting on the couch too, snuggled up to another man, blushing and giggling while whispering intimately back and forth. The boy didn't work directly under Alexander, but instead worked on another floor entirely, so he clearly had no reason to be there except to be with Maria. 

 

Alexander noticed where Thomas was looking and sighed happily. “I'm glad Maria is finally moving on from her ex. Mathew will be very good for her.”

 

The two exited the building as Thomas was thinking through the realisation that Alexander's special someone was not Maria. This only made Thomas wonder even more about who could've stolen Alexander's heart as they drove to pick up Philip. 

 

That night, Alexander once again crawled into Thomas’ bed after placing the baby monitor on the bedside table. 

 

“Nightmares?” Thomas asked. 

 

“Not tonight.” Alexander snuggled up to Thomas’ back and relaxed. 

 

“Then why?”

 

“I could hear your brain struggling to think the whole way home. You should be careful, otherwise you might hurt yourself.”

 

Thomas reached back to smack Alexander's shoulder. “Shut up.”

 

“What has you thinking so hard?” Alexander asked through a fit of giggles. 

 

The thing about these late night talks was that they made Thomas far more honest than he would be at any other time, so he only paused for a brief moment before responding, “You.”

 

Alexander stopped giggling immediately. “Me?”

 

“You,” Thomas repeated. 

 

“Why were you thinking about me?”

 

Thomas turned around to look Alexander in the eyes. “The other night you said you were falling in love again, but I can't seen to figure out who could've stolen your affections so quickly.”

 

Alexander hummed. “Is that why you were watching Maria and Mathew at the office today?”

 

“I was wondering if she was the person you were talking about,” Thomas admitted. “You both seem close at times, but you seemed to happy for her and Mathew for it to be her.”

 

“You're right.”

 

“Can I get that in writing?” Thomas joked. 

 

Now it was Alexander's turn to smack Thomas. “Fuck you.”

 

The two took a moment to laughter before sobering back up. 

 

“So who?” Thomas asked. 

 

Alexander looked up into Thomas’ eyes. “I thought I was being rather obvious.”

 

“Then spell it out for me.”

 

“I can do better than that,” Alexander whispered with a mischievous gleam in his eye. Thanks was all the warning Thomas got before Alexander was wrapping his arms around his neck and pulling himself up to gently kiss his lips. 

 

Thomas was so startled that it took him several seconds to finally wrap his arms around Alexander's waist and kiss back while holding him as gently as possible. 

 

When Alexander finally pulled back, he had a wide grin stretched across his face. “You're taking me to dinner on Friday night. Pick a nice place and bring flowers. I want to be treated like a prince.” With that said, the hurricane that was Alexander Hamilton swept out of the room, leaving Thomas to wonder what on Earth had just happened. 

 

Thomas finally just buried his face into his pillow, thinking he was too old for all this drama, but also looking forward to Friday night with a small smile on his lips. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goodness, it's been a while since I've updated. Sorry for the long wait everyone!
> 
> Anyone who might have read the previous chapter may now notice that rather than having only two planned chapters in the final product there will now be four. That number is still up for change if I find myself writing even more than originally intended. 
> 
> As always, comments and kudos give me life. See you all in the next chapter!


	3. So Bring Flowers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit shorter than the last two, but I like where it ends. Sorry you've all been waiting so long for such a small chapter.

In Thomas' opinion, Friday both couldn't come fast enough and came far too soon for him to properly prepare himself. Not that he hadn't had enough time to physically prepare and make reservations at a nearby restaurant. That was done the morning after the two agreed to go on a date. No, Thomas felt like he hadn't had a chance to prepare mentally. Just the other night he'd been asking Alexander who he'd fallen in love with and now he was taking said man to a fancy dinner. 

 

Work was strangely normal for Thomas. He worked steadily through a pile of paperwork and emails while just down the hall Alexander's office was a constant stream of extreme productivity. Those poor interns once again struggling to keep up while the secretary rushed to answer a seemingly endless stream of phone calls and emails. Same as always. 

 

Thomas just shook his head while thinking about those poor souls. He was just glad Alexander was stuck getting rides to and from work with him, so he couldn't pull any more all nighters. He dreaded the day Alexander finally learned which bus routes to take to get to work from his house. 

 

Before he knew it, the work day was already over and Thomas was knocking on the door to Alexander's office while the secretary watched with a raised eyebrow. 

 

"Come in," was called out from inside, so he took hold of the doorknob and walked in. 

 

The interns surrounding Alexander's desk looked at him with pleas for help in their eyes while said man continued furiously typing at the computer. He spared a brief moment to acknowledge his guest with a succinct greeting of, "Thomas."

 

The others in the room we're in utter shock that Alexander had greeted him with his given name, rather than his surname and hadn't even bothered to tack on an insult. It only occured to Thomas in that moment that they hadn't interacted at work at all lately, so their coworkers wouldn't know about their recent familiarity. 

 

"Alex," Thomas replied, continuing to add to the confusion. "We need to head home now if we want to make our dinner reservation on time."

 

The poor interns and secretary, who poked her head into the room out of curiosity when she failed to hear angered screaming, we're gaping in shock as they looked back and forth between the two. 

 

Alexander looked up in obvious excitement after hearing those words. "Give me five minutes and I'll be ready to go." He began furiously clicking away on his computer, even faster than before if that was even possible, saving files and shutting down everything he'd been working on. 

 

The others were left wondering if they should be grateful Thomas had freed them or horrified by the events they'd just witnessed. 

 

Once Alexander was ready, the two walked out of the office together. Any interns still watching them until they were out of sight saw Alexander take Thomas' hand and lace their fingers together. They all just looked at each other and silently agreed to forget everything they'd seen. 

 

That evening, the two sat at a table in a restaurant neither could bother to remember the name of. All Thomas needed to know was that it was fancy enough by his standards to take someone on a first date and Alexander only knew that it was a place Thomas had picked. The two were tucked away in a secluded corner, surrounded by candle light, which suited the both of them perfectly fine, since they were both free to appreciate how good the other looked in a nice suit. 

 

"You take all your first dates to such fancy places, or am I just special?" Alexander joked with a teasing smile. 

 

"What first dates?" Thomas asked. "I haven't dated since I married Martha and even then she preferred secluded picnics to busy restaurants."

 

Alexander hummed and looked around. "I wouldn't call this busy." The restaurant was barely populated due to the large amount of space between the tables to give each one the illusion of privacy. "But I think I agree with her at least a little. Fancy restaurants don't suit our relationship."

 

Thomas chuckled and took a sip from his wine glass. "You mean they don't suit you. I like to think I'm classy enough to wine and dine a beautiful man when we go on dates." He took hold of Alexander's hand and lightly kissed the back of it. 

 

"Pffft," Alexander let out a laugh at Thomas' words. "Alright, I'm not used to fancy dinners and expensive wines. But what I meant is that we've gone from being at each other's throats almost non-stop to dating in such a short amount of time that a burger at a McDonald's seems like a more suitable first date for us."

 

Thomas actually let out a laugh this time. "You might have a point, but you also said you wanted to be 'treated like a prince' the other night."

 

Alexander laughed with him. "Yes, because I figured you had enough money to throw a little around and make some grand romantic gestures that would embarrass you in the long run when my interns end up gossiping about them for the next few weeks. And speaking of the other night, I told you to bring flowers."

 

Thomas looked a bit sheepish as he responded, "I might have forgotten that part."

 

"You'll have to get me some after dinner, then." Alexander hid his smug smile in his own wine glass. 

 

The two spent the rest of the night sharing pleasant conversation until they'd finished their meal and then laced their fingers back together as they walked out. They drove off to a nearby flower shop, still holding hands over the gearshift of Thomas' car. 

 

Once they arrived, Thomas walked in with Alexander laughing and yelling, "Make sure it's big enough to show off to my interns at work."

 

He spoke to the man at the counter for a few minutes with a smile on his face while the florist looked a bit confused for a moment before looking out the window at Alexander and finally going into the back to collect a bouquet. He then pointed out the individual flowers before he was paid and Thomas walked out with them. 

 

Once the door closed, Alexander noticed the shit-eating grin on the other's face. "What has you so happy?" he asked. 

 

"I bought you a bouquet, darlin'. Why wouldn't I be happy?"

 

Alexander eyed the flowers. "I think you're a little too happy about the flowers. What are their meanings?"

 

Thomas' grin got impossibly wider as he replied, "I walked in and ask for a bouquet that means 'fuck you.'"

 

Alexander burst out laughing. "Oh my God! I thought the florist looked confused."

 

Thomas continued to explain while Alexander was too busy laughing to say much more. "He said this one," he pointed to a purple flower, "is geranium, which means stupidity. This one," now pointing to an orange flower, "is an orange lily, meaning hatred. This one here," a small, yellow flowers, "is St. John's wort, meaning animosity. Over here is fragrant coltsfoot," he pointed to another small yellow flowers. "It means you get what you deserve. Finally, this is a yellow carnation." He pointed towards the last small.flower. "It means that you have disappointed me."

 

Alexander might as well have been rolling on the ground at this point, with how much he was laughing. "For the record," he gasped between his laughter. "I like sunflowers."

 

Thomas moved forward to pull Alexander up from his hunched over position and hand him the flowers when he tripped over an uneven portion of pavement. He stretched his unoccupied hand out to catch himself and protect the flowers, but still had to drop them to catch himself after hearing something in his wrist popped. 

 

Alexander really was on the floor now with how hard he was laughing. 

 

Thomas let out a loud groan and looked up at Alexander. "Alex," he started. "My sweet and considerate darling," he said with heavy sarcasm. "I think my wrist is dislocated."

 

Of course, this only set off another round of laughter. 

 

"I need you to drive me to the emergency room."

 

Alexander whipped a year from his eye as he replied, "I can't drive. I don't even have a license."

 

All Thomas could say to that was a quiet "Fuck."

 

Once Alexander had calmed down enough to call for an ambulance, the two were finally picked up for a ride to the nearest hospital. 

 

"I take back what I said at dinner," Alexander spoke up. "This was a perfect first date. I'd rather do this again than go to a McDonald's."

 

The paramedics gave him a strange look at that comment, but eventually ignored it. 

 

Thomas could only groan again, trying to decide if he'd made a mistake agreeing to a date with the man next to him. Either way, their relationship was bound to be interesting. 

 

Once they both got home, it was late in the night and the kids had all gone to sleep hours ago. 

 

Thomas lingered in the doorway, turned to Alexander, and asked, "So I know the night didn't go where we expected, but I thought we could still end on a positive note."

 

"I thought the night was plenty positive. Watching you trip over your own two feet was the highlight." Alexander had that shit-eating grin on his face again. 

 

"Anyways!" Thomas interrupted before Alexander could continue making fun of him. "I was thinking we both could sleep in the same room tonight."

 

"That's a bit forward for a man who just dislocated their wrist."

 

Thomas' face began to flush. "I didn't mean it like that! I just meant that you've been crawling into my bed a lot lately and it was about time I invited you instead."

 

Alexander once again laughed at Thomas and how embarrassed he seemed to be. "Alright, but first I want a kiss goodnight in the doorway."

 

"Like the scene between a guy and a girl at the end of a date in a romance movie?"

 

"Exactly like that. I'll even fumble with your house keys if you want me to."

 

"Christ," Thomas cursed. "We're going to the same place. Are you secretly some huge romantic?"

 

"Of course I am. Just wait until I start writing you poetry."

 

"You aren't serious." Thomas gives Alexander a nervous smile but drops it when the smile on the other man's face convinces him to think again. "Oh my God, you're serious."

 

"You're the one who started it. Stalling in the doorway. Inviting me to bed," Alexander purrs. 

 

"Stop fooling around." Thomas reached into his pocket and pulled out his keys to open up the door, but when he really started to think about what Alexander mentioned, he began to fiddle with his keys instead. 

 

Alexander noticed the fiddling and reached out to still Thomas' hands. "I thought I was supposed to be the one with the keys." He looked up at the other with a smirk before stretching onto his tiptoes and capturing Thomas' lips with his own. 

 

The kiss was chaste and over before Thomas had really noticed that it had even started. As soon as their lips separated, Alexander grabbed the keys from Thomas' hands and unlocked the door himself. He walked in and immediately wandered up the stairs, leaving Thomas with his mouth gaping open in the doorway. 

>  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: Thomas Jefferson once dislocated his wrist in an attempt to impress a girl.


	4. And Lay Them At My Grave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please take note of the tense changes in this chapter.

Of course it's warm and sunny that day. Any other person would think rain is more suitable, but Thomas knew that Alexander always had to be a little different. 

 

He takes a moment alone to suck in a deep breath and remember some of the important moments. 

 

-

 

The morning after their first date, Thomas awoke to find Alexander watching him with that smug grin on his face. He decided to roll his eyes at the other man before getting out of bed and getting dressed. 

 

Later that night, Thomas pulled Alexander aside and handed him a key. 

 

"Is this…?" Alexander started. 

 

"A key to my house. I want you and your family to stay as long as you'll have me."

 

Alexander looked up at Thomas with a wide grin before latching on to him. He reached up and cupped Thomas' face in his hands before stretching onto his toes and kissing him gently. 

 

-

 

Thomas had looked back on that day with fondness many times. He clutches the bundle in his hands a little harder as he continues to look back on all the memories. 

 

-

 

Alexander asked Thomas on their next date and seemed to find the look on his face hilarious as they strolled up to a McDonald's. Of course, Thomas thought, only Alexander would decide to have their date in such a ridiculous location. 

 

Surprisingly, they ended up having a better time there than they had on their first date. No one was rushed to a hospital and the two were happily laughing together by the end of the night. 

 

-

 

It would be poetic to say that only a single tear slips down Thomas' face as he recalls all his happy memories, but in truth tears are streaming down his face. He has no idea how he's managing to speak in front of the large crowd. 

 

-

 

The day quickly arrived where Alexander had all his belongings brought in from his old home. It became a day long event, with all hands on deck to get everything moved as quickly as possible. Even Alexander's eldest daughter, Angelica, had made a trip over to help with the move. 

 

Throughout the day, Thomas' home was filled with noise and laughter as everyone ran around, moving furniture and boxes into bedrooms and around the house. 

 

Thomas looked up at the family portrait at the top of the stairs and smiled at the sweet look on Martha's face. At last, the home they'd bought together was filled with the sounds of happy children. 

 

He jumped a bit when Alexander came up behind him and took hold of his hand. 

 

"I think we should hang a portrait of all of us next to that one."

 

Thomas appeared shocked by what Alexander said. "You don't want me to take it down?"

 

"Of course not," Alexander said gently. "She's important to you, and I wouldn't dream of taking that away."

 

Thomas adopted a soft smile onto his own face. "You know, the walls in the living room have plenty of space for the pictures from the mantle of your fireplace."

 

The photos were quickly hung around the walls of the living room after that and a new portrait of the large, happy family was taken and placed lovingly, right next to the one already hung above the stairs. 

 

-

 

Thomas thinks of the two pictures still hanging above the stairs as he continues narrating to the crowd. He can see Alexander's children mixed with his own in the front row. Not a single dry eye can be seen among them. 

 

-

 

It didn't take too long for Alexander to propose to Thomas after moving in. The two men were both strolling through the local park when he stopped to kneel down on one knee and pull out a ring. 

 

"I know we haven't been together for more than a few months," he started. "But the two of us have already loved so much of our lives and I don't want to spend any more of mine without you in it." At this point, he just began to nervously ramble as Thomas smiled fondly. "And, I mean, who knew we would work so well together? I certainly didn't. Not that I'm not eternally grateful that we do. I can't tell you how happy being with you every day makes me. After all, we both ha-"

 

"Alex," Thomas interrupted, taking pity on the other man. "You have to actually ask me the question."

 

"Right!" He took a moment to clear his throat. "Thomas, would you do me the honor of marrying me?"

 

Thomas' smile stretched across his face as he responded with a happy, "Yes."

 

-

 

Thomas speaks to the crowd about all these stories and the happy times he'd had with Alexander throughout the last few years. The last quick story he has to tell is about one of their happiest memories together. 

 

"When the date of our wedding finally came around, Alex had spent so long stressing and planning the little details the night before that he forgot to get any sleep."

 

-

 

Thomas gave an exasperated look across the stage towards Alexander, who had called asleep on his feet. He gripped the man's hands a little tighter with his own before giving them a solid shake and startling him. 

 

The marriage officiant had long since stopped speaking, surprised when Alexander had begun to snore. 

 

"You may continue," Thomas said as Alexander blearily looked around. 

 

The officiant hesitantly continued forward with the wedding until the vows came around and Alexander pulled a large stack of folded papers out of his pocket. Thomas would like to say he'd lovingly listened to every long-winded word in Alexander's rehearsed speech, but the reality was that he'd pulled the pages out of the other's hand before he could get started and reminded him that "I love you, but we only rented the venue for a couple hours, sweetie."

 

Alexander pouted for a moment before replying, "Fine. You're a fucking asshole though."

 

The officiant proceeded to be absolutely shocked by both vows when he couldn't tell whether they were declarations or incredibly creative insults. Little did he know, they were both. 

 

-

 

"I'm going to end my stories here before I embarrass the both of us even more than I already have. Thank you all for being here to honor Alex's memory," Thomas says to the crowd. 

 

He takes a few steps off the stage and to where a coffin sits on display and lays the bundle of sunflowers he's been carrying on top. The stems are a bit crushed from where Thomas had been squeezing them, but Alexander would've loved them anyway. Thomas leaned in and whispers, "Thank you for the many wonderful years my love." A few more years slide down his face as he whispers a final, "I'll see you on the other side."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those who might not have noticed, the story was meant to be Thomas reminiscing about his relationship with Alexander during his funeral. 
> 
> Thank you all so much for sticking around through the entirety of this story. I'm sorry it took so long to finish. 
> 
> Don't forget to write comments please. I always get really excited when I see a new one. 
> 
> Until next time. <3

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading if you've gotten this far! This fic has been in the works for months, and unfortunately I can't give an exact date for the next chapter, but I'm doing the best I can. 
> 
> Comments always motivate me to write more, so please write some. 
> 
> See you in the next chapter!


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